I went to see a man about a mutt
“I need a dog” I says
“One that’ll bite and bark
and tear the ankles off the bastards;
the ones next door”
(I was feeling loud and in need)
“I want a big ugly brute…
a Halloween dog that’ll scare
Scare the frigging world away”

“Mmmmhmmmm…
we got a beast like that fershur”

If words could be fat, sweaty and gross
his would have been…they dripped
dripped all over me –
this was the guy to sell me a dog;
a Cerberus, bone-crunching shit of a dog

“Show me”
So he did
The most beautiful nightmare with teeth
you ever did see
“He’s gotta take abuse too ya know;
he’s gotta know master by fist an’ by boot;
by sharp edged, blood-cutting tongue”

“Look on then man cuz this ain’t he”

“Watcha mean? This was he is what you said!”

“This ain’t he an’ I ain’t selling him
cuz this dog, this dog’ll run”

“How do you know that!
You’re making me mad
boiling, salt water mad!”

“I just know…it’s in his eyes – look”

So I looked and there it was –
this dog’ll run…so I left
and that was that.