I having been mulling this subject for awhile…the subject is in the form of a question. Which tends to be more effective in transforming lives (assuming some lives need transformation) people or programs? While I personally believe there is a gut instinct response to this question I want to investigate whether it is correct.
My gut tells me that people are the most effective means of transforming other people. So if this is the case why do we rely so strongly on programs? Don’t get me wrong, I think programming is required to allow for efficient use of resources and management of large groups of people toward a specific and visionary end, however at the end of the day programs must always be sacrificed for the sake of people.
When was the last time you heard someone say “it was the English program at my high school that transformed my life” or “I first encountered God through the fine programming efforts of my church.” What you hear is “I will never forget my Grade 12 English teacher Mr. Peter Knowles” (who was, in fact, my grade 12 English teacher and who I will not, in fact, forget). Or “it was through my youth pastor or pastor or best friend at church or Sunday school teacher that I first encountered God.”
It is always people, people who intentionally step out on a limb and decide to to that scary step into another person’s life, that make a difference. People who genuinely desire to connect to the other, to know and allow themselves to be known, without pretense, titles, or barriers of office. It is people who rise above programs and positions that impact other lives.
So what does this mean? It means our programs must be slave to relationships and not the other way round. In schools, churches, business and home our role is to create environments that facilitate relationships. This does not mean dumping a bunch of people into a large room and then expecting relationships to “just happen” because contrary to popular belief, people do not just become vulnerable and connect with one-another. Why? We live in a world that has made us cynical, suspicious and frankly frightened of others. We immediately wonder “why do you want to know me? what is in it for you?”.
So if dumping people in a room does not work how about dumping people in a room with a set of instructions like: A) Say hello to person on you left B) Await hello in response C) wait for relational transformation. Of course I am being facetious but you get the idea. What is the missing ingredient? Leadership. There are some called to positions of authority (or have sought them out called or not) in our schools, churches, businesses, communities etc. who are required to show the rest of us what happens when we step into the lives of others, for real, in the flesh, face to face. This kind of leadership leads by example. Sometimes this kind of leadership points to other leaders like Ghandi, or Jesus, or Rick Warren, or Billy Graham, or Pierre Trudeau etc. as examples of this kind of leadership but frankly, at this point, they are leading by proxy. While inspiring, the story of a dead or famous individual’s compassion will never change a person. Their example must take on flesh in the eyes of the people. It is not the leader’s job to point to better examples of leadership, it is the leader’s job to become that which they so admire.
Personally the reason I think leaders (and most people for that matter) do not do this is fear. People fear being vulnerable, they fear being rebuffed, they fear being hurt. These are all normal fears and if we were mere animals we would be wise to follow these fears. We are not, however, merely animals, we are image bearers, we are humanity and we rise above our fears for the sake of the other. This is one of the things that makes us human.
I was transformed not by books but by the man who cared enough to spend extra time with me in grade 12, to see past the exterior that showed an intensely shy kid from a welfare poor single-mom family, and into the potential writer and teacher that simply needed encouragement. He was not paid for the extra hours spent with me and eventually we became friends. Here I was a grade 12 student and I could call my English teacher – friend. He took a risk on me, opened up to me about his own life and hopes, and in the process helped lead transformation.
That is what people need…caring, transformational leaders who take the time to step into a few lives and become vulnerable and watch as those people gain the courage to step into other people’s lives and watch them do the same.
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