i used to guard against happy
don’t be too happy
i would tell myself
it might annoy people
keep the happy inside
until it cools like lava
forming a hard obsidian layer
beautiful
but
impenetrable
reflecting other’s feelings
back at them
like a deep, black mirror

these days
i take my emotions
as they are
the good
the bad
and the ugly
but especially the good
because why not
happy wells up
like an unpredictable geyser
and you have to capture it
you have to save it in bottles
to use later
or to give to the ones
who need it the most