i know the weight of a child’s life
in the hands of a blind, angry nation
i know how much it takes to tip the scales
away from a place where the fearless live
and toward the dark, entombing earth –

just 3.88 grams

it doesn’t take much
to tear the fragile ones from our grasp
and send them hurtling into oblivion
leaving them empty on the hard floor
just fear, just selfish desire, just cold hearts –

just 3.88 grams

look,
we are ribbons in the wind
twisting and reflecting colour
in a thousand different ways
while anchored,
nailed to the world
as unwilling sacrifices
seeking to reach out,
to follow the sun in the west
discovering where it hides
in the cold nights

even the light of the crescent moon is enough
to highlight the beautiful and the quiet
that sings through cicadas and crickets
in a rare warm evening breeze;
and you would be forgiven
if you wanted to stand in this place,
to breath it in forever

even the light of the crescent moon is enough
to dispel the sad dark hearts that linger
over the graves of regret and past mistakes;
may we whisper prayers of forgiveness
to ourselves and the ones who tore us up
for the sake of the ones who tore them up

i saw her standing on an old gold 1950’s velvet couch
and for a moment i remembered being her in that place
standing in California pastels with sunlight from the windows
yearning for a man i don’t know but probably knew once
realizing that, given enough time, we will be everyone
realizing that, given enough time, we will be everywhere
and there is enough time for each of us to be each of us
what an irony of force fed empathy and understanding

ah i see,
i see
you have come undone
in the raging wind
that pulls your threads apart
and scatters them to the east;
but now
you are no longer bound
to this place and this time,
you are seeds lifted to the skies
and sent into the gray world
as rainbow spot lit shreds
of a previous whole
to touch the uncountable ones.

ah i see,
i see
you have come undone,
you have gone on the run
a glittering, wild presence
under a loving and life-giving sun,
and this is not to be mourned
because you are so much more
to be scattered on every shore
as witness to what you are
now brazen, embracing champion
of what you will become
while a million, million birds
weave you into their nests
and sing songs of nurturing
in your beautiful presence

rejoice,
for you are the stuff of life!

lean in
close to the canvas,
you can almost
taste the colour
laid down
as cheek,
as lips,
as bright gaze,
look hopeful
past your face;

lean in
close to the canvas
’til the paint
becomes a part of you;
you once one
now intermingled two;
you once one
now intersex’d two;
a dream of life
lifted from a static, flat place;
you once one
now a living, breathing thin space
dancing with your own
beautiful creation

lean in
there is a new world waiting

where are all the new words
that i might encase this façade
with something brighter
something brash and brilliant?
where oh where should i look,
for all i have left
are the old and cracked bricks
of days faded past memory
and a mortar than runs hard
in the bracing cold

marshal the forces
you hide within
to stand amongst
this prostrate crowd
that, for a moment,,
you are above them all
and seen by every eye

get along, get along
just get along
move along
fall into line
or fall away
but don’t stop
lest entropy take you
away from us

there i am
a sputtering, flashing spark
fighting the pressing days
screaming quiet in the dark
that i might present a smile
to the beautiful wide world

so i take my bits and pieces
and crush them in my fists
until they change to harder words
that i might lock my broken away
into this small box of poems
i carved with my heart and bones

and sometimes i extinguish myself
to sit quiet in my numbing black
cherishing the feeling of nothing
while the waves crash in the distance
like an ocean a world away
that can never erode me further