Over time I have been compiling a list of things, that, should I ever do said things, my loved ones have been instructed to shoot me.
- Get locked into a particular decade of music and just stop there
- Starting sentences with the phrase “in my day…”
- Tell strangers about how turmeric helps my achy joints
- Lose the ability to understand new technology
- When 40 percent or more of my diet becomes fibre
- Regularly wear socks with sandals
- Pull my pants/shorts waistline over my belly button
- When more than half of my conversations are about my ailments
- When I start competing with others about how much sicker I am than they are
- Go to the beach fully clothed in pants, shirt, socks, shoes, hat, coat etc.
- Say NO to every suggestion about literally anything
- Assume people younger than me are less intelligent than me
It’s a short list but growing every day…