“A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit.”

– Proverbs 15:13

It seems an appropriate day to speak of a happy heart…after all that is what this day is supposed to be dedicated to. I like this verse from Proverbs because, as Proverbs is wont, it speaks to us of not just the benefit of a thing but the detriment of its absence.

A happy heart = a cheerful face
Heartache = crushed spirit

To speak of happiness and heartache is dangerous ground to tread because the diversity of viewpoints and intense emotions that rise in the discussion.

Few things highlight the deficiency of language more than a discussion of emotions like happy, sad, love, pain and hate.

The words themselves are barely splinters poking above the surface, mere iceberg tips that reveal scant few details of what is running beneath in the deeper waters of our psyche.

When we tell someone we are happy what do we mean? Does that word do the feeling justice? Not even remotely. How about when we tell someone we are not happy? Once again the words do not do justice to what is really going on.

Words. I love words. I make my living with words.

But…

Words alone do not come close to doing emotions justice.

Words are merely invitations to a closer look…to something relational, something communal. If we ignore the invitation we are limited to our own interior lives in attempting to understand the ones around us…in attempting to understand God even.

Someone says something simple like “I am happy” and we would be remiss to hear that as a simple proclamation, moreso when they say “I am not happy”. There is a world of depth and meaning behind the words but to get at it requires true, genuine relationship.

When God says to Peter – “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter is confused. He hears only the words and fails to draw on the depth of the relationship he has with Christ. He gets angry and frustrated because he does not realize the words are mere shadows of the intent.

It is the same for us whether we are reading our Bibles and simply interpret God’s word as though the intent was merely hidden in the dictionary instead of our relationship with God or when we are speaking to one another.

There can be no real understanding of another’s words without the context of genuine, loving relationship…without the relationship the words are merely air and bound to be misunderstood.

On this day and the days ahead take some time to gain a deeper understanding of the people around you…the ones close to you – the words they say to you are mere doors to something far deeper and worthwhile.