Are we

Invisible ink

Written into the world

And brought to life

By a small burst of light

To be seen for a moment

A year or ten or

Maybe thousands

Bound to fade

Leaving only impressions

In time?

I said

Hello beautiful

To the shadows

That circle my world

Surely fully formed

Somewhere else

Except here

They’re black and grey

Charcoal angels

Flying about my head

Singing in a minor key

Songs written

By a hand like mine

With words

That would make you cry

If you could feel

Just a little

I’m up

Earlier than usual

                         Again

As if

A sun is rising

Slowly warming

My dead flesh

Reanimating

A life

I have not felt

In a very long time

It is growth,

Life on the verge

From a spring

That may emerge

If the weather holds…

Neither anxious

Nor altogether calm

Neither tired

Nor generally awake

Neither dark

Nor is there much light

I am lost in limbo

That place of discontent

Where everything is waiting

And morning is coming

Like a bull racing towards the matador

Who stands still to be gored

Starring the day with blood

I hate time change

It fucking sucks

Go to hell time change

Everything is the best

The best it’s ever been

Until it’s not

Until it’s the worst

The worst it’s ever been

And I have emotional whiplash

From the g-forces that tear me apart

From this strobe light life

Of bright and dark and bright again

Some days fade away

While they’re happening

As if they never were at all

Torn paper bookmarks

Jammed between the pages

That mattered more

Eventually forgotten

I am

The blink of an eye

Even less

Within eternity

I do not exist

I never was

I never will be

I am not.

Lay prostrate

Look up, look out

There is the incandescent glow

And shadows cast Doreen halls

This safe place of walls

Of stone and doors

Of roof and floors

Like an embrace

That takes away fear

In the closing dark

Quiet is the evening time

No moon, no stars

No sound of the turning earth

Only the in and out of breath

And the beating of a heart

The soft, gentle thrum

Evidence of a life