The greatest burdens of my life have been dark and heavy secrets.

As a child having been sexuality abused, the burden was being told this so-called relationship must be kept secret. People would not understand. I would be blamed and get in trouble. People would be angry at me.

All these lies were designed to be locks holding down the lid that kept in these dark and secret lies.

The longer they were kept in the greater my shame grew,  the greater the weight, until I felt crushed beneath a pile of rotting garbage.

For a child, this was unbearable.

Eventually, when the weight of sadness and depression grew too much, I confronted my abuser, unburdened myself of the lies, and sent him away forever.

The lightness i felt that moment is indescribable and ranks as one of the greatest, strongest moments of my life.

As odd as it might sound, I often think about that moment like I am now… not to relive the trauma but to remind myself in my darkest moments of the possibility of light.