Quartz will steal our sleep
cold paws that step on the face
still we must love her

I watched as the light

Of our ever present star faded

Becoming less than it has been

As if a darker form passed before it

Eclipsing the older glory

So we mourned the loss

And lived in cold twilight

Scarce remembering

Past days of warmth

Lost in half lit shadows

Waiting for the moon to pass

And glory to be restored

I got up on the dark side of the bed

It was like waking up at the bottom of the sea

There was this weight, this crush, pressing down upon me

And everything was dark as the dead

What a thing to start the day with

As though every act was pointless

As though every breath was fruitless

And warming, lifting light was a myth

I got up on the dark side of the bed

But rather than sinking away as lead

I forged a path to the surface instead

i have a habit of falling into wells
because my mind wanders to dark places;
i have a habit of stumbling into caves
because my eyes tend toward black spaces;
but i climb out

every.

single.

time.

my arms are strong and i carry rope
my legs have grown large and i wear spikes
i have developed these tools
to pull myself back to open air
time and time and time again;
even now my written words
are fingers grasping handholds
pulling me every upward
to the places i need to be
where the wind blows strong against my flesh
where the light warms me through and through
and i can remember with powerful force
who i am –

a man who can carry himself on his own back
a man who can take the punches from any attack
a man who is not the same
as once he was in days gone by
a man worthy of the name,
a man who is learning to fly.

Here’s what I know

If you hate your heaven

Have the courage to go

And choose your hell

Take up your hammer

Ring the great black bell

For all to hear –

Every other act

Is made from fear.

There is space for one soul

To travel alongside

One light’s umbra

To lay over your own

To rest softly inside

Another would corrode

And fall to pieces

Another would fail

Until one releases

It is the way of things

It it’s how our being sings

Instead of shrieking

Until time’s end

My heart lives here

In this place

Beating out a rhythm

That I breathe to

That I live and laugh,

That i love to

In this space,

My heart lives here

Always

My heart is my own

It is never on loan

It sings me to sleep

In the coming dark

It wakes me in the morn

With sun’s new arc

Always.