i’m leaving my life behind
in words and pictures
i’m leaving my self with you
emptying it all
in thought and memory
recording it
to the air and the aether
because everything
waits to be filled by you and i

we are eternally everywhere
look. see.

shall we make sad choices for our friends and family
shall we make the choices too difficult for you and me
shall we call together the ones we missed and want to see
shall we break our peace and run to set those captives free

or

shall we sing in silence as the rotting dead pile up
shall we look away from the things we feel we cannot stop
shall we live in guilt and shame looking down instead of up
shall we close our mouths from singing cuz we could’nt drink from the cup

shall we sleep in darkness throughout each and every dismal day
shall we wear sackcloth and ash to match our soul’s fecund gray
shall we crawl upon our knees and make the decision to stay away
shall we live in this place of ours while others take the bill and pay

we shall we shall forever in disgrace we shall
we shall we shall forever in remorse we shall

or

shall we strive forever to be some kind of seed
shall we join our friends to fight and sing and stand and bleed

i don’t know what’s right to do
i don’t know which god to pray to
i just know i’m safe and fed
waiting here to bury the dead
i’m lost in crippling doubt that fills my crippling head
i’m drowning in my sea of peace while others give their lives to shed
i’m drowning in my sea of peace as others give their lives to shed…

cold leaks like poison
past the towels and the clothes
stuffed under doors
around windows;
no heat this month,
not if you want to eat;
and she takes the little ones
and makes a fort
because it’s warmer together
than apart.

she would like more,
more than just to exist,
even if by proxy
through the ones
she will leave behind.

i am looking for an identity
a box of things just for me
a this and that for you to see
that i am different – uniquely

and so around the world i seek
into corners and crevices i peek
as a crow does, with my crow beak
proud of my singular. focused technique

and if perchance i take from you
a little something i did pursue
know that your gift – i will imbue
a purpose bright, a purpose true

i am me
and this identity
is new, not stolen from they or he or she
just borrowed and remade
that i might be measured, that i might be weighed
and found to be a gathered golem. a masquerade
in scrubbed lies, now truth arrayed

send me
fire me
like an arrow
or a bullet
give me
task me
rather than
i sit
unmoved
unmoving
as dust
i need

momentum

we wake
from our evening stupor
in mild sleep-induced confusion
and stare dumbly into the world
as if new to it;
we break fast with coffee
and seek the sun.

it finds its way to us
and we find our way to it
lover and loved
in a warm embrace
of a forever moment –
captured.