emotional vomit

sometimes time moves sooooooo sloooooow…you feel you have all the time in the world to accomplish the things you want to and suck all that you can out of life. All your objectives and desires can be completed…it is just…a matter…of time.

Other times it feels as if there is no time. Like the future is just a place to put things that you would rather not do…and the thing about the future is that it is always that…the future is always the future…the present is the only time we have (I think I poem’d this recently).

I am pensive. I feel “the unbearable lightness of being” and every other existential cliche out there.

Maybe I ate a bad burger for dinner.

There is no point to this post…just an emotional vomit.

whose golem am i?

go into,
go into the world
but
how should the world
come into me…

make…go and make…
but
will i be made?
who’s golem am i
that i may be formed
as an image to bear?
a message to bear…

the everlasting dawn

Heaven’s ceiling has drifted away with the dark
and we are left with a greater height to ponder
bathed in beatitudes of blue and gold
while the white thumbnail of the aging moon
fades into the treetops that reach for her
with wind quickened grasping living limbs,
and that same life takes hold of me as well
and pours the everlasting dawn into my heart

three shards

three bright shards spun off my sword
to come and forge themselves anew,
a trinity of purity to break there own way;
such tempers as are tempered in this world
to a finer cutting edge than most
that they might slice through the dim
and never blunt with each dulling blow;

three shards…

one Matthew
one Caleb
one Isabella

take my iron forward as their own,
take my fire and my song and flown –
into the great and into the wide
but never into the deeper dark alone

Science: The New God

Science is the god of the 21st century and like most gods it is developing a large, unquestioning, unthinking horde of followers. Science has been emerging for centuries now but only in the past 100 years or so has it attained to the level of deity as many a man and woman has bowed down before its alter or sacrificed others upon it.

Let me back track for a second. I am not anti-science. I work at a natural history museum whose very existence is dependent upon the exciting advances that have been happening in science. I practically drool over every new discovery or theory in quantum physics and am staggered by how much we have come to learn…but always there is a need for humility…a recognition (admission?) that we will never know everything…that there will always be mystery…no matter what your discipline.

For centuries science and religion have been butting heads as they seem to increasingly encroach and contradict one-another. Most recently representatives of science such as rockstar Neil Tyson Degrasse Tyson and pop scientist Bill Nye have adopted a somewhat adversarial approach in their dance with faith and religion.

There is a strong and developing polemic or dichotomy occurring wherein the going feeling is that “this town ain’t big enough fer the both of us” in that “this town” is the world and western cultural dialogue between the white hatted cowboy of science and the black hatted evil doer of religion and faith.

Now some would respond to this by saying that science and scientists have been burned at the stake (literally in some instances) long enough by advocates of religion and its time for science to have its turn with the match so-to-speak. There is no doubt that many scientists have suffered in the past at the hands of the faithful for the sake of their craft, from Galileo to the countless women naturalist healers who were accused of witchcraft and executed. 

You have heard it said (by mother no less) that “two wrongs do not make a right” and I think we need to hear this loud and clear. First we must admit that it was wrong of religious representatives to persecute scientists simply for observing the universe and reporting on their observations (this is, after all, what science is about). Second, advocates of science must admit that persecution of people of faith for having different ideas on the emergence of the universe and the way it worked, is wrong and makes them the new bully.

Humility is key but this is a hard attribute to come by when the entire world depends upon you for its well-being, internet, heat, light, computer etc. just as humility was hard to come by amongst faith groups when the world depended upon faith for its continued understanding of things.

History is often a good teacher in these moments of impasse. History teaches us that there was a time when science, mathematics, history itself, art, poetry, music, and religion were all branches of a single form of thinking – philosophy (aka love of wisdom). The human desire to know was not compartmentalized into silos like so much grain and chaff. The deeply devout and religious Pythagoras was also a mathematician and a musician. These seemingly separate disciplines fed one-another rather than battled and so it can be again if we focused on dialogue rather than diatribe; discussion rather than distance…but this seems a long way off.

Science has been increasingly unhappy with the idea of God. So much so that the great thinker Stephen Hawking recently supported M-Theory as the solution to creation – that theory which states the universe was created spontaneously out of nothing and by nothing. I find this as something I am unable to accept but I am not willing to ignore, disrespect or shout down Hawking and others like him for attempting to explain the universe in a way different from how I understand it – and I would hope for the same respect in return.

The reality is that both science and faith could progress significantly if they worked together rather than wasting precious time and resources in combat. Science could continue to focus on measuring the observable universe and stop attempting to measure the immeasurable and faith could stop dogmatically attempting to take the profound mysteries it has been entrusted with and redefining it in terms of physics, geology and biology…thus missing the divine point entirely.

How do we forward such a harmony? We do so by refusing to become simplistic thinkers. Do not push science into one box and faith into another…let them mingle and challenge one-another as iron sharpens iron, that, in the end, we are presented with something positively remarkable in its brilliant complexity. 

 

the breeze

sometimes the still soft breeze
must become a hurricane
to shake us from our hidden places
and tear the roof from our lives;
often the breath must turn to a roar
for us to be awakened; for us to take notice

Conclusions

My life is a journey. I have been on this journey now for 46 years. In this time I have come to the conclusion that conclusions are deaths. I am slowly stopping coming to conclusions in favour of simply continuing the journey. Most conclusions are symbolic of stagnation or a stopping of some sort along the way. To conclude anything seems somewhat arrogant on the one hand as it suggests a certain omniscience. On the other hand it can also suggest a kind of giving up – a sense that, in the face of all there is to know and experience (and all we must humbly admit we cannot, nor ever know) we must simply pick a point along the way and stop…making that place definitive of that part of the journey.

No I think I will simply keep journeying and meeting other travelers along the way to compare notes with, learn from and teach what I can.

perfect day

It is the most delicate
white cotton whisp
that hovers in this still,
impossible breeze,
then trails here and there
slow and dancing in sun
before my sullen eyes
signifying that this will be
a rare and perfect day

Good Bones

There were run-down homes
with blacked out eyes
and shutters askew like
gravity pulled harder to the left
while their furnace hearts
were long since seized cold

but…

these places with their faces
falling to the earth
they had good bones
they had the promise of a past
made into some new future
because the core was beauty
wrapped in tissue time

echo of God

sometimes i hear the echo of God’s words
in the empty places inside and out
like ghosts haunting the homes of their past
moving aimless through the halls
seeking a witness to their once lived lives
declaring that “We too moved in the world”