gossip

  • noun 1 casual conversation or unsubstantiated reports about other people. 2 chiefly derogatory a person who likes talking about other people’s private lives.

Gossip is verbal poison. There is no better way to describe it. The above definition comes from the Oxford English Dictionary and it is suitable but does not really speak to the human impact of gossip. In a small town gossip is like air – for some folks it is as though without it they would die. We are all guilty of spreading it once in a while. I know to my shame that I have engaged in it.

Not surprisingly the Bible has nothing kind to say about gossip and lists it among some of the worst of human activity. Check out Romans 1:28-32

Furthermore, just as they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, so God gave them over to a depraved mind, so that they do what ought not to be done. They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; they have no understanding, no fidelity, no love, no mercy. Although they know God’s righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them.

Paul has some pretty harsh words here but not because he was the subject of gossip as much as what he knew gossip could do to the community of believers. Gossip is listed alongside murder and hatred. It is like an acid that can corrode the very bonds that hold community together. Eventually, if left unchecked it will destroy the community. Gossip kills.

I write this not because I am a target of gossip (and frankly I wouldn’t really care if I was) but simply as another of my various observations of life. Gossip is rampant among youth and we do our best to teach against it but on most occassions the youth I have heard gossiping are simply passing on what parents and older siblings have been modeling for them.

An odd thing about gossip is that some people have become so used to doing it that they no longer are aware of when it is happening. It simply has become a part of their personality, their fabric. So I offer a few tips on how to recognize and avoid it:

1. When in conversation with one or more people NEVER speak critically of a person or community who is not a part of the conversation. Never.
2. Before saying anything about anyone ask yourself why it needs to be said. Info for the sake of info is generally useless.
3. Before you raise a person for public prayer ensure you have that person’s permission first. Otherwise pray inwardly – God will still hear you.
4. When in conversation with others beware of sentances that begin in the following ways –

"Did you hear about (INSERT NAME HERE)?"
"Isn’t it sad about (INSERT NAME HERE)?"

5. If you find yourself on the receiving end have the courage to change the subject and tell the person why?

As damaging as gossip is it is relatively easy to avoid. Follow the above rules and I can guarantee you that you will never have to worry about spreading gossip.